Well, I was planning on doing this post yesterday but I got too wrapped up in the day.
I am always so thankful when I have a day off of work when DH will be working. I am able, on days such as this, to feel connected with my home and see it in a new light.
I was enjoying my lunch in the basement family room while I watched a show which had been recorded on TIVO and I lifted my eyes to see sun shining through the little half window above the couch. I suddenly realized I had never noticed the sun in this room. I am working so much I haven't even had the joy of seeing how the sun hits the upright piano on a sunny afternoon. I cried, both for joy and for sorrow. I am so out of touch with my home I don't even know its inner workings. I am so blessed I was able to witness this moment of clarity and enlightenment. It reminded me of one of my favorite hymns.
Open My Eyes
Open my eyes, that I may see
Glimpses of truth Thou hast for me;
Place in my hands the wonderful key
That shall unclasp and set me free.
Silently now I wait for Thee,
Ready my God, Thy will to see,
Open my eyes, illumine me,
Spirit divine!
Open my ears, that I may hear
Voices of truth Thou sendest clear;
And while the wave notes fall on my ear,
Everything false will disappear.
Open my mouth, and let me bear,
Gladly the warm truth everywhere;
Open my heart and let me prepare
Love with Thy children thus to share.
I was able to focus on my home yesterday. I threw open the windows in the master bedroom and the bathroom. Opened the door from the kitchen to the screened in porch (much to the joy of Spaz who ran out immediately and basked in the sun rays on the porch swing) as well as the front door to let the light in. I put on a sweatshirt to keep myself warm from the cool air coming in and put myself to work.
I cleaned the bathroom in detail, so nice to have a shiny bathroom.
I washed a load of laundry as well as dried and put away.
I emptied ALL trash cans for the garbage men to haul away (they don't have Presidents Day off)
I cleaned out my fridge
I loaded my dishwasher
I shovelled my front porch and driveway
I read Little Homes and Big Heart
I made dinner
I greeted my DH who came home at 3:30 to pack a suitcase for his trip
I prayed with DH for a safe drive and profitable week
I closed up the windows, lit some yummy candles;
Took a nice hot shower in my nice clean bathroom and snuggled into my freshly made bed to fall into a deep, peaceful sleep.
After all I accomplished yesterday and the eye opening fact that I CAN accomplish things at home all day I am much much closer to deciding to come home to stay. I have established routines for my daily life now and can see the benefit of being a SAHW. I am becoming more convinced I can overcome the fears and apprehensions I listed before in this post.
I am excited to see the progress I am making.
8 comments:
Ooooh, don't you just *love* Little Homes and Big Hearts? That's my favorite Keepers book, except for the marriage book.
Rean, I found your post so inspiring....You see I am home all of the time but sometimes I feel like I'm not all there....meaning I'm escaping via computer/blogs, etc.....My biggest struggle is the computer!
Thank you for reminding me to notice how the sun comes in in certain rooms and to really tune-in to my home again.
And remember that if and when you decide to come home, there **will** be days where you will wonder "What in the world did I do?!" It's not always easy and fun. Sometimes it can become monotonous and frankly it's a lot of hard work. And when I'm feeling that way I think back to the days I worked outside the home and I remember how monotonous that was and how much hard work it was and how tired I was all of the time, and how dirty my house was. Working outside the home isn't all fun and games either! MOST of the time I LOVE being home and I wouldn't wish to do ANYTHING different!
Blessings!
~Mrs.B
That was a beautiful, inspiring post. Being home is such a blessing for me, but sometimes it takes a reminder like this for me to see the true joy in being home. Thanks for sharing.
Congratulations on accomplishing so much!
Mrs. B - I adored that book. It was so uplifting. There are times I wished I just had a little house to tend to but that book really opened my eyes to the fact that we can have the right HEART no matter what size our home is. I am currently reading Parlor and Kitchen and I am enjoying it as well.
I was amazed when I realized that I had never really seen the sun in that room. Anytime DH and I are there it is dark (night) and I am never home during the day to enjoy the daylight. Needless to say, I recognized I had neglected the dust in this room. Nothing like a little sun to really show you how clean the room is!
Thanks for the encouragement. I am getting so much closer. DH even asked me on Tuesday if I had told my bosses yet...he meant if I had told my bosses "I quit." LOL, it really blesses me to know he backs me up.
Devildogwife- I am happy to have shared. I think that is what I enjoy so much about the blog community. We really do encourage each other and rejoice with each other.
Kim- Thanks!! After that day, I realized there is so much to be done at home but one day here and there just isn't going to cut it! I have set up some routines to help keep things in check but I really see how a woman can stay plenty busy at home!!
Rean Day
Rean,
I've read it at least 4 times and I have even underlined and highlighted passages.
I've read Parlor and Kitchen several times and really enjoyed it as well. I have also highlighted things in it too.
And lol yes, sunny days *do* reveal the dirt and dust! But then again, light always does.....
Blessings,
~Mrs.B
Hi Rean,
I'm catching up on all my blog reading, for some reason your page wouldn't refresh as I have it saved in my favorite places. :)
I'm going to look that book up you mentioned today while I browse the book store.
Have a great day!
Deana
What a wonderful post! You got lots accomplished and I will have to look for that book, it sounds great!
Kelli
Post a Comment