Side Table REVEALED

Here is my side table after the decluttering. I left just one decorative item on my table.

You can actually see the beautiful filigree on my lamp now. So much nicer.












I left my photo albums here for now but at least they are in order and I know where to find them.

The yarn basket is empty and I have put it with my other craft items.

My beards are in my "costume box" for when I start teaching school or need one for a skit.




Three of each song book is plenty.

We had bible fellowship at our home recently and no one needed one anyway. But the song books are there when we need them.

Plus it keeps me from cramming stuff in there too. :)

More Emotional Clutter than Physical

Coming into this project I knew there would be physical clutter and I was ready to conquer it. I don't think I was completely prepared for the emotional clutter I will face. The hall closet wasn't filled with mementos, just jackets and junk. A lot of jackets and junk. I wasn't expecting a little side table to stump me so badly, but I am still more than a conqueror and I got through it!


This is the little side table area closest to the hall closet. It is almost entirely unusable as a side table because of the "decorations."

This side table has a shelf on the bottom too. It has stuff on it as well. Surprise surprise.












The hidden horrors. Although this junk is clearly visible when you first come into the house, I am able to ignore it because it looks fairly decent from the front. Not anymore.













Not too much in this drawer, but we'll see what truly belongs soon enough.


Time to empty this little area out.









All laid out and categorized. It really helps the process when I can see everything. This stuff was all from the top of the side table and from the drawer.

We need the song books for our bible fellowship, but we don't need them all in the side table. I kept three of each and stored the rest with our other research books.










THIS was what was under the table and behind the table and trying to hide in the table. When taking out the photo albums I came across my big find for the day...








Pittsburgh sports paraphernalia. That's Malkin from the Penguins and Polamalu from the Steelers. My husband will be so surprised when he finds these framed and hanging on the walls of the Man Cave later on. I have to find frames but the wonderful black and gold colors match so well with simple black metal frames.

The Polamalu trading card may have to find its way into my wallet...he's such a cutie!!




These are solar landscape lights my wonderful husband got me for our anniversary last month. I'm not sure what I was waiting for to put them out in the yard. They have now been placed in our flower beds and have inspired some changes to our outdoor spaces.












Under the 50 CDs of very excellent bible teachings, I found a bowl full of change. The money is in my piggy bank and the CDs are making their way into the hands of people who need them since I have listened to them already.







This is where my decluttering took a more emotional turn. I am keeping all our photo albums and I can think of no other place to store them right now. I am hoping to eventually have a place for them in my office. The problem is I don't have an office...yet. This is one of the things I am working toward.

The emotion started when I emptied out my knitting/crochet basket



It is not a very full basket. As a matter of fact, it contains only two WIP's (Works In Progress).

The blanket on the left is what brought the emotions.

It is the blanket I crocheted while we traveled back and forth 4 hours round trip to Pittsburgh for fertility treatments. For 2 years. Without success.

It also almost became a blanket for the adoption of a newborn baby boy, but the birth mother decided to keep the child after it was born. I always intended to finish it and save it for the child we would eventually have.

While we have not given up hope, my wonderful husband and I have decided to focus on loving each other and the life we have.

Not that I speak in respect of want: for I have learned, in whatsoever state I am, therewith to be content. Philippians 4:11

It was time to give up the blanket. But how and to whom? It has such painful memories I can't bring myself to give it to friends or family. I know there are organizations which take blankets for preemies and new moms and I am sure they would love the blanket.

But that would mean researching it and finding one locally and time and more time and some more time. I can't make this decision more than once, I need it to go, I am taking it to Salvation Army. They will find someone who will love it and I won't have to think about it any more.

Sigh.

It's done now. I can always start another one if and when we ever move toward starting a family again and it will be made with joy and not sadness.

OK, no more tears!!! We'll move on to the other WIP. It is much more fun. I made two of them for a skit we did for our bible fellowship. I had to play the part of Daniel. I'm not a man. I don't have a beard. So, I made one. I made two because we needed a King and the other person performing in the skit was a girl too.


Aren't they fabulous?
Oh, yeah, way too sexy!

I decided this was no longer a WIP, I finished them and they can be stored away for our next skit.

Or for the next occasion I need to make the model "duck face" for my blog.

First Closet, CONQUERED!!!!!!!!!!!

And now for the big reveal!!!!


Here it is, all clean and organized. Only what we find to be useful or believe to be beautiful is contained in this closet.















This bin contains hats and gloves. The number of hats is even smaller now after I went through them with my wonderful husband when he got home from work.

It's positioned on the smallest shelf of the shoe rack. I put it low so we could access it easily. If it was up on the shelf above, we'd end up hanging hats all over the place because it would be hard to put them away.




Empty space for guest's jackets. I removed about 50 hangers from the closet. My brother is using them now for his clothes in his room...well, he will once he hangs everything up off of the floor. :)

There is a folding chair and a step stool on the right. They are no longer buried behind so many coats its impossible to access them. I have used the step stool twice already!








These are our jackets. Basic needs are met, we have warm sweatshirts as well as light jackets and windbreakers. My nice wool trench coat is here as well.

I love the wooden hangers from Ikea!












Do you see the double layer of wood which is the shelf? The second layer used to extend the shelf all the way to the door but that made the shelf too deep for practical access.

It was already in two boards, I just stacked them so the shelf is more shallow now.

The red blob on the left is a neck pillow I like to use for long trips. When we got rid of our Minivan in favor of an extended cab Ford F150 there was no longer storage for it in the vehicle. Now I can reach the pillow and the fleece blanket under it when we leave for a long trip and can stay toasty warm when Hubby cranks the AC.

For several minutes after I finished this project, I sat on our couch reading but left the door open to the closet so that I could glance at it and smile.

I have one kitchen trash bag of Donation Items and one trash bag of trash.

AMAZING!!!

I am so blessed to have started.

First Closet, EMPTIED!!!!!!

This post will be filled with photos. I'm so excited I've started this journey. I'm enjoying the benefits of it already.





This is my closet in the beginning. Although it doesn't appear to be packed to the gills, it is.
















Ahhh, a nice clean closet. I swept and mopped the floor and I cleaned off that shelf.

So nice and fresh and ready to receive whatever I find to be useful or believe to be beautiful.












This is all the stuff which came out of my closet.

The first thing I did was categorize all the items as I removed them. It was easy to decide to be brutal with my decluttering.




This row is simply decorative items. Specifically wreaths and items which were at one time hanging in my entryway.

The kicker is that I have basement storage for each season and these could easily store there. However, I decided to keep only one wreath and donated the rest of the items to salvation army.

The two plaques got homes on walls in other areas of my home.









These are all the bags I found in the closet. Bags I forgot we owned. Some which needed to be given away and some that I want to use again.






And this is where my biggest find was...




That is a Nikon 35mm camera, a $600 camera.

It takes fantastic pictures, but is is heavy and not digital. Although we have taken many pictures with it in the past, we don't use it anymore and are probably not going to use it again.

After discussing with my husband we decided if we can sell it for $400 we can put that money toward a nice Digital SLR camera if we want to. So, for now it can go back in the closet but will be listed somehow for sale.






There are jackets in this pile that have been with us since before we were married. That's over 8 years!!

Now, this would not be a problem if we wore them at anymore, but we don't.

There were over 15 coats here but I cut it down by over half. We have 7 coats now that are worn frequently and we enjoy. Four of them are hooded sweatshirts, but they are useful and we think they are beautiful.







Hats, glorious hats.

A different hat for every day of the month...that's right, over 30 hats!!! Whew!!!

I got rid of many of them, even some Pittsburgh sports team hats, which is a victory in itself!

My husband just laughed as I laid all his hats out for him to see how many he had. He was able to be more decisive because he saw how much excess there was. Its true, if you don't see it, you forget about it. We were able to narrow our hat collection significantly.

I got rid of all the winter scarves I had. I don't really use them and they aren't particularly beautiful to me.

I also got rid of our earmuffs, you know the plastic headband ones, the ones you wore when you were 5, yeah, those.

Works For Me Wednesday: Shower Clutter

So DH and I used to have the constant battle of all married couples where the wife (or husband) purchases every possible concoction to have in the shower. Not enough room on the little bitty ledges to hold all the bottles. (Curse you Bath and Body Works with your big sales!!)

So when I saw this in Home Depot while looking for...whatever it was DH wanted at the moment (curse you Home Depot and your many many aisles) I knew we had to buy it.

DH has the left two (one for shampoo/conditioner, one for body wash) and I have the other two (one for shampoo, one for body wash). I also use the little shelf for my conditioner and shave cream and we hang our scrubbies on the little hooks. I have a razor that came with a wall attachment and that is on the left side of the dispenser.

Having only one container for body wash limits my selection but now I can store my other scents in our linen closet and switch them out when my section is empty. This allows us to buy shampoo in larger containers because we are refilling and don't have to have the bulky bottles on the ledges.

We have had ours for 2 years and if something breaks which has happened twice now, we can order parts from the company.

It really works for us.

Tackle It Tuesday

One way I thought I could get back in the swing of blogging was participating in the great "Days of the Week" challenges I see on others' blogs. Today is Tackle it Tuesday and that means I have to find something undone to finish. I think the only problem for me will be where to start!

Because I have many MANY chores to do at home, I thought I would tackle some run around errands throughout my day today.

1. Schedule doctors appointments;
2. Ask for time off for doctor appointments;
3. Return library books - library is downtown where I work; and
4. Pick up new contact lenses.

Whew, getting these things done during the day will allow me to focus on my home tonight.

To check out more Tuesday Tackles or to add your own, go to 5 Minutes for Mom.

I've been tagged - Library meme

Molly over at Cuppa, Cuppa, Cuppa posted this meme.

Literary Meme

How it works:

1. grab the book closest to you

2. open it to page 161

3. find the 5th full sentence

4. post the text of the sentence to your blog

5. don't search around for the coolest book you have, use the one that is really next to you.

6. tag five people to do this meme

The book next to me is Paralegal Practice and Procedure: A Practical Guide for the Legal Assistant

The Sentence is "Moreover, to develop your skill requires constant practice, practie and more practice."

That is pretty cool. I have been struggling so much with developing my homekeeping skills. Who knew the answer to my problems was in a book I use for work! LOL

I guess I need to get back at my Amigurumi Chicken pattern I picked up from this site I will show pictures as I move along. I started it the other day but I was using pink yarn and no stitch markers. I'm stuck now because I can't remember where my rounds started and I don't know how to decrease. I will restart the pattern after a quick stop at Walmart. I will pick up some white yarn instead of pink.

I Am Making Progress

This past weekend I got a lot accomplished. I did my routines (was up early and everything!) and even got some extra housework done. Here's a picture of my stars...




I did really well on Monday as well, although I don't have a picture of that one. Tuesday and Wednesday are a different story all together.

On Tuesday I decided not to take a shower that night because I was too tired. When I woke up on Wednesday I was so mad at myself for skipping that item on my routine. DH gave me a "free pass" on the laundry because of the plumbing situation but I ruined my "star power" by skipping my shower. So silly of me. So here I was on Wednesday, mad at myself for "failing" and giving up on the day because "the month is ruined anyway."

Can you say PERFECTIONIST!!!!!!!

Last night I was moping and pouting. DH wouldn't let me get away with it for long...he knew why I was pouting, I wanted him to say "it's ok about yesterday, go ahead and put your star on, it's been a rough week...etc." How childish and immature I am!!! Well, I renewed my mind and cut up some leftover steak for stirfry. I made dinner and got a load of laundry started. DH cleaned up the kitchen (unloaded and reloaded the dishwasher) and gave me a big hug. He reminded me I didn't need a "month" of stars, I need 30 days of consecutive stars. That is my goal. It was time to refocus and get back in gear.

This morning I had a dentist appointment at 8:00 A.M. I could have given up on my Morning Routine because "I don't have time this morning" but I DIDN'T.

I got a load of laundry started and I got the dishwasher unloaded. I have bible fellowship tonight so dinner will be quick and easy, maybe another stirfry, maybe some fast food. DH will be working late so he will probably grab a bite on his way home.

I am making progress but bad habits (and attitudes) are really hard to break! I am so thankful my DH knows me so well and is willing to lovingly reprove me with the Word when I am wrong! *Happy sigh* I am such a blessed woman.

Romans 12:2

And be not conformed to this world: but be ye transformed by the renewing of your mind, that ye may prove what is that good, and acceptable, and perfect, will of God.

Romans 8:1

There is therefore now no condemnation to them which are in Christ Jesus, who walk not after the flesh, but after the Spirit.

Terra Cotta - Great for Pots, Not for Pipes PART 2 (or Why I've Been MIA)

OK, so this week has been REALLY rough. If you will refer to this post you will be up to date with our situation.

OK, so they flushed the pipes and came back to see what the problem was (they couldn't see for all the "gunk" last time). In one month we were completely backed up again! I was so discouraged. Here is the whole tale.

The plumbers came out and put in their camera to take a look. After ~16 feet they were to the NEW back up. The plumber took his little "find the camera" thingy (like a metal detector) and went outside to find the camera. I watched from the basement door. He paced out about 16 feet and started looking in an arc to find the spot of the problem. The arc got closer and closer to our home. (at this point I am praying "not in the house, not in the house, not in the house") When he came back to the door he said, "well, we're in the house."

"NNNNNOOOOOOO!!!!"

He searched in the basement and found the spot. In our family room. IN our family room!! IN OUR FAMILY ROOM!!!

We scheduled the excavation (read: jackhammer 8 feet of our floor and remove the "contaminated material" and busted pipe) for the next day (Tuesday, March 5th). I took the day off of work, my bosses were very understanding, and stayed at home to "supervise" the work. (read: Pray, pray, pray, pray, pray. Oh, and pray)

At the end of the day there was a big hole in the floor of our home and more bad news. The pipe INSIDE our house is collapsing (read: $5,800) and we need to fix it soon. The pipe OUTSIDE our house is collapsing (read: $6,000) and we need to replace it. After spending almost $4,000 on this emergency repair I was a little shell shocked.

I have been very dejected from all this. DH has been working so hard during this outage and I have been handling all the communication with the plumber. I was mortified to find out that we needed $11,000 worth of work done. I was scared and depressed.

DH came home yesterday and gave me a big hug. We talked about the situation. The inside pipe can wait for a while. The only pipe they were talking about was from the floor drains in the storage side of the basement and the laundry sink. (NOT all the plumbing in the house) The inside repairs can wait. (Praise the Lord) As for the outside repairs, we will get a second opinion. DH has received a reputable plumber's name from one of the guys he works with. This co-worker was born and raised in this community and his family is very involved. He is a GREAT source for recommendations.

For now, we have the emergency fixed, the pipe has been replaced and the hole has been filled with new concrete. We can use the "facilities" as well as the dishwasher and laundry. We can wait until we get a second estimate for the outside work and save for the rest of the inside work.

I am so much more peaceful. I was trying to stay my mind on the promise of God "And we know that all things work together for good to them that love God, to them who are the called according to his purpose." Romans 8:28. I love God, I am called, I must trust in Him to work things together for good.

As I was digesting that the family room carpet would have to be torn up for the jackhammer to get in there I thought about the fact that I was so disappointed when we couldn't re-carpet the basement when we first moved in two years ago. We have this harsh RED carpet in there right now. There is NO padding left and it is cold because of the concrete beneath it. Now I see the "work together for good" in that situation. We would have had to tear up the new carpet to fix this problem if we had gone in debt to put the carpet in the family room. "Thank you God, you knew this was coming and made it less painful by 'working together for good'."

Well, I will post on my weekend later, including pictures, but for right now I am going to listen to some calm music and thank God for His love and care for my family.

"Success Breeds Success"

This is what my mother would say to me when I would complain about having to do some little chore around the house when there were "bigger" things to be done.

Success Breeds Success = Faithful in least, faithful in much



That's right ladies...TWO stars now! And today has started off strong. DH said that on the weekends as long as I am up before 7 A.M. and get the rest of the things accomplished I can consider my Morning Routine successful. I was up at around 6:30 and have been running ever since. I took a break for a little while and watched "Nanny McPhee" on TV. So cute, it's like Mary Poppins with a little "umph."

Now I have more chores to get accomplished and some errands to run.

DH is working today and this week is going to be rough for him. He is the Engineer at a Natural Gas & Steam (called Combined Cycle) power plant and they are having an "outage" right now. Basically, they shut everything down, open things up and then they deep clean, repair, modify or overhaul everything and get everything up a running again. A LOT of long, hard days lay ahead and I know I will need to be on top of my game (so to speak) to keep everything peaceful. DH said there were three things he would like for me to focus on this week.

• Peaceful & Tidy Home
• Laundry Done
• Iced Tea ready when he gets home

He would also like simple meals that can be reheated if necessary. I think this week will be a time for cassaroles. I only have ONE in my repetoire (Shepherds Pie) so I guess I better do some digging. Any recommendations would be appreciated.

This is going to be a great week for me to work on my Husband Keeping skills :)

My Routines

As I stated yesterday, I am focusing on establishing routines in my life. This is something I learned but never implemented from Flylady but was further encouraged by an article on Survival Basics by Large Family Logistics.

Here is my Morning Routine:


This is what I am to get accomplished before I leave for work at 8:40 A.M. One thing that has made my "Read the Word for 15 min" easier is this program. It really helps to have the definitions of words right at my fingertips. I enjoy reading my Bible in a big comfy chair, but sometimes I need more focused study in the mornings.

Here is my Evening Routine:


This routines starts when I get home. It is mainly a list of things I need to do before going to bed. I may expand on these routines at a later time but for right now they are posted on my bathroom mirror where I can see them everytime I go in that room.


You can see the reflection of our shower curtain in the mirror. The wallpaper is really bold 70s but I've tried to "go with the flow" and keep with the green/yellow color scheme until we can redo the bathroom.

My goal is complete my routines (both Evening and Morning) everyday for one whole month with no skipped days! So far March is looking good.



Can you see the sparkle? Here's a close-up.



YEA!!! I am so proud of me. One thing I am able to shift from Evening to Morning is the "Put laundry in dryer" I can do this before I leave for the day, then I just fluff them in the evening and put them away.

I am blessed I am making these routines work for me.

Focus and Shining Stars

I wish I could remember where I got this little picture. It really blesses me. If anyone recognizes it, please let me know, I want to give credit where credit is due!
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Shame on me for taking so long between posts!

I have been under the weather this past week. I believe I came down with the stomach bug so many people were talking about. I am grateful to be feeling much much better today.

Work is going ok. I have been so unfocused lately. I know part of it is because I have not been putting my full heart into my job. As much as I want to be home full time I know I have a responsibility to my Heavenly Father to represent Him in ALL that I do. Yes, even my full-time, away from home, mentally exhausting, secular, exciting, rewarding job.

DH and I talked last night about my lack of focus at work and my desire to be home full-time. We decided that until I get my Morning and Evening Routines down for a month I shouldn't even think about quitting to come home. I need to set myself up for success and establishing those routines is the way I can do this. I will do a separate post on my routines. I have silver stars I will be posting on my calendar at the end of every day to show myself I am accomplishing my goals.

I am so very thankful to have a problem-solving, sweet and loving supportive husband.

I feel all shiny inside!! It's time to make my calendar shiny too!

Presidents Day - A Day of Focus

Well, I was planning on doing this post yesterday but I got too wrapped up in the day.

I am always so thankful when I have a day off of work when DH will be working. I am able, on days such as this, to feel connected with my home and see it in a new light.

I was enjoying my lunch in the basement family room while I watched a show which had been recorded on TIVO and I lifted my eyes to see sun shining through the little half window above the couch. I suddenly realized I had never noticed the sun in this room. I am working so much I haven't even had the joy of seeing how the sun hits the upright piano on a sunny afternoon. I cried, both for joy and for sorrow. I am so out of touch with my home I don't even know its inner workings. I am so blessed I was able to witness this moment of clarity and enlightenment. It reminded me of one of my favorite hymns.

Open My Eyes

Open my eyes, that I may see
Glimpses of truth Thou hast for me;
Place in my hands the wonderful key
That shall unclasp and set me free.

Silently now I wait for Thee,
Ready my God, Thy will to see,
Open my eyes, illumine me,
Spirit divine!

Open my ears, that I may hear
Voices of truth Thou sendest clear;
And while the wave notes fall on my ear,
Everything false will disappear.

Open my mouth, and let me bear,
Gladly the warm truth everywhere;
Open my heart and let me prepare
Love with Thy children thus to share.

I was able to focus on my home yesterday. I threw open the windows in the master bedroom and the bathroom. Opened the door from the kitchen to the screened in porch (much to the joy of Spaz who ran out immediately and basked in the sun rays on the porch swing) as well as the front door to let the light in. I put on a sweatshirt to keep myself warm from the cool air coming in and put myself to work.

I cleaned the bathroom in detail, so nice to have a shiny bathroom.
I washed a load of laundry as well as dried and put away.
I emptied ALL trash cans for the garbage men to haul away (they don't have Presidents Day off)
I cleaned out my fridge
I loaded my dishwasher
I shovelled my front porch and driveway
I read Little Homes and Big Heart
I made dinner
I greeted my DH who came home at 3:30 to pack a suitcase for his trip
I prayed with DH for a safe drive and profitable week
I closed up the windows, lit some yummy candles;
Took a nice hot shower in my nice clean bathroom and snuggled into my freshly made bed to fall into a deep, peaceful sleep.

After all I accomplished yesterday and the eye opening fact that I CAN accomplish things at home all day I am much much closer to deciding to come home to stay. I have established routines for my daily life now and can see the benefit of being a SAHW. I am becoming more convinced I can overcome the fears and apprehensions I listed before in this post.

I am excited to see the progress I am making.

Terra Cotta - Great for Pots, Not for Pipes

DH and I had noticed an "off" smell in our home. As soon as you walked in the door, it smelt as if I had broccoli sitting in the closet, just waiting to be found. After you left the entryway it disappeared and only reappeared as you opened the door to head down to the basement family room and laundry.

I have searched for 2 or more weeks for the source of the smell. I cleaned throughout the house. Found my nephew's lost car and my nieces Christmas gift (don't ask) but no broccoli, no dead animal, no "foreign objects" anywhere.

In deep frustration I spoke to my dearest friend and her family. They suggested the possibility that something had crawled in my heater vent system and died. Eeek! I was going to call the duct cleaners when the smell disappeared last week. I thought we were home free. DH was out of town last week and things were nice and quiet. On Friday I did a load of laundry and left for work. When I arrived home the smell was BACK!!! "Oh for heaven's sake!!" I exclaimed to my befuddled husband who had just arrived home from a loooonnng drive. I had wanted the house nice and fresh with the laundry done when he came home.

Long story longer, we have terra cotta pipes running from our home to the sewer line and they have shifted and collected "gunk" along the way. Doing laundry was the culprit. After $600.00 worth of "Hydroscrubbing" (read pressure washing) we can now do our laundry, take a shower and run the dishwasher among the other normal activities. We cannot, however, leave the terra cotta in the ground the way it is. We have another appointment with the plumber to determine how much time and money it will take to replace the pipe so we aren't seeping into the soil around our home.

I guess I will have to plant my tomatoes in Terra Cotta pots instead of in the ground this year. It's a good thing terra cotta is good for pots!

My Passion to be a SAHW and a Request for Help at the End

For a very long time I have longed to be a wife and mother. I have never had an intense desire to have a career. I attended college for 2 semesters and the best thing that came from my college experience was meeting my DH online.

DH proposed about 4 years later and I accepted. We were married in 2002.

Before our wedding, we learned DH had the opportunity to take a job in SW Pennsylvania, close to where his family lives.

We were moving! We moved almost one month after we were wed. I was raised in a military home and was used to moving. I was truly excited about the prospect of a new, fresh start as husband and wife in a new town.

DH had a good job and financially I didn’t need to work. FINALLY my time had come. I was going to be a SAHW and certainly, within a couple of years, we would be bringing our first child into the world.

As is so often the case, life did not go as planned. That first year I stayed home and expected to know EVERYTHING I need to take care of DH and our home. I expected to become my mother when that ring went on my finger. I was disappointed in my inability to focus on our home and our inability to have a child. I was unable to take care of my home, uncaring about my appearance, and downright FRUMPY.

It was hard not knowing anyone nearby. It was hard only having one vehicle, which husband took to work. That first year at his job he was working 80 hours a week. He was exhausted when he came home and I was miserable. After talking it through we decided I should try to find a part-time job, just to help me get out of the house and the ever present funk I was in. We bought a second vehicle and I put in for any part-time secretarial position I could find.

Flash forward 4 years. I am working 40 hours a week. We have our own home now and I have matured greatly from where I was 5 years ago. And now…

I WANT TO COME HOME!!! I want to be a SAHW. We understand it will take more financial and emotional effort to have a child (due to fertility problems). We understand it may never happen. I am willing to accept that (for now). I don’t have the empty feeling inside anymore. I know I am to be FIRST AND FOREMOST a helpmeet to my husband.

I am anxious and I need to be sure about my decision. DH will support me either way. He understands my desire to be at home and truly, I think he would prefer it. He does not, however, want the old frumpy wife again. Thus, I need to be sure about my decision.

We talked about it about a month ago and DH had some valid points. This is what I am working on right now.

These are the components DH has witnessed I need in my life to be happy and productive.

• Social interaction;
• Sense of purpose;
• Accountability;
• Being a contributing member of society; and
• Being challenged by my work.

I have all these things at my job and DH wants me to figure out how I will be able to find them at home or, if I can't find them, how will I supplement them.

I need to reason it through and identify where these components will come from. DH can’t provide a lot of them because he works ~ 12 hours a day.

I need to study each component in the Word to see where biblical women got these things.

Thanks so much for reading this. It was more about putting it in writing than anything.

I am not looking for counsel. I want to make that clear. I know that this is our family’s decision.

I am simply looking for the right avenues to research. I want to be able to make a decision on this by summer of this year and I just thought I could get some good resources from you all.

I have a wonderful woman who is our Fellowship Coordinator’s wife. She is wonderful to bounce thoughts off of. I just thought I would take advantage of the on-line community and any input you might have about books or simply records to look at in the Bible. I am currently reading through Ruth and noting (where I can) where Ruth received her support and all of those things listed.

Thanks so very much.