More Emotional Clutter than Physical

Coming into this project I knew there would be physical clutter and I was ready to conquer it. I don't think I was completely prepared for the emotional clutter I will face. The hall closet wasn't filled with mementos, just jackets and junk. A lot of jackets and junk. I wasn't expecting a little side table to stump me so badly, but I am still more than a conqueror and I got through it!


This is the little side table area closest to the hall closet. It is almost entirely unusable as a side table because of the "decorations."

This side table has a shelf on the bottom too. It has stuff on it as well. Surprise surprise.












The hidden horrors. Although this junk is clearly visible when you first come into the house, I am able to ignore it because it looks fairly decent from the front. Not anymore.













Not too much in this drawer, but we'll see what truly belongs soon enough.


Time to empty this little area out.









All laid out and categorized. It really helps the process when I can see everything. This stuff was all from the top of the side table and from the drawer.

We need the song books for our bible fellowship, but we don't need them all in the side table. I kept three of each and stored the rest with our other research books.










THIS was what was under the table and behind the table and trying to hide in the table. When taking out the photo albums I came across my big find for the day...








Pittsburgh sports paraphernalia. That's Malkin from the Penguins and Polamalu from the Steelers. My husband will be so surprised when he finds these framed and hanging on the walls of the Man Cave later on. I have to find frames but the wonderful black and gold colors match so well with simple black metal frames.

The Polamalu trading card may have to find its way into my wallet...he's such a cutie!!




These are solar landscape lights my wonderful husband got me for our anniversary last month. I'm not sure what I was waiting for to put them out in the yard. They have now been placed in our flower beds and have inspired some changes to our outdoor spaces.












Under the 50 CDs of very excellent bible teachings, I found a bowl full of change. The money is in my piggy bank and the CDs are making their way into the hands of people who need them since I have listened to them already.







This is where my decluttering took a more emotional turn. I am keeping all our photo albums and I can think of no other place to store them right now. I am hoping to eventually have a place for them in my office. The problem is I don't have an office...yet. This is one of the things I am working toward.

The emotion started when I emptied out my knitting/crochet basket



It is not a very full basket. As a matter of fact, it contains only two WIP's (Works In Progress).

The blanket on the left is what brought the emotions.

It is the blanket I crocheted while we traveled back and forth 4 hours round trip to Pittsburgh for fertility treatments. For 2 years. Without success.

It also almost became a blanket for the adoption of a newborn baby boy, but the birth mother decided to keep the child after it was born. I always intended to finish it and save it for the child we would eventually have.

While we have not given up hope, my wonderful husband and I have decided to focus on loving each other and the life we have.

Not that I speak in respect of want: for I have learned, in whatsoever state I am, therewith to be content. Philippians 4:11

It was time to give up the blanket. But how and to whom? It has such painful memories I can't bring myself to give it to friends or family. I know there are organizations which take blankets for preemies and new moms and I am sure they would love the blanket.

But that would mean researching it and finding one locally and time and more time and some more time. I can't make this decision more than once, I need it to go, I am taking it to Salvation Army. They will find someone who will love it and I won't have to think about it any more.

Sigh.

It's done now. I can always start another one if and when we ever move toward starting a family again and it will be made with joy and not sadness.

OK, no more tears!!! We'll move on to the other WIP. It is much more fun. I made two of them for a skit we did for our bible fellowship. I had to play the part of Daniel. I'm not a man. I don't have a beard. So, I made one. I made two because we needed a King and the other person performing in the skit was a girl too.


Aren't they fabulous?
Oh, yeah, way too sexy!

I decided this was no longer a WIP, I finished them and they can be stored away for our next skit.

Or for the next occasion I need to make the model "duck face" for my blog.

Anniversary Trip

I can't believe it has been almost 7 years I have been married. DH and I are in Lancaster, PA for the weekend to celebrate our marriage and to go to an exciting bible fellowship meeting on Sunday.

We arrived late yesterday (Friday) and got settled in our hotel. We relaxed for a bit and then went to the Windmill restaurant so I could have Pork and Sauerkraut over Mashed Potatoes...delish!! I don't get to have that very often because DH doesn't like the smell or taste of sauerkraut. We drove around a little while and enjoyed the country air. I love it out here. I love the acres of farm land just sprouting and the little farmhouses with Peonies blooming all over. We grabbed some Apple Dumplings for dessert back at the hotel and had a lovely evening.

I am so excited for today! We are going to the Sight and Sound Theater and we are going to see the play "Abraham and Sarah: A Journey of Love." On the drive up here we listened to the book of Genesis and heard from the very beginning to the time of Jacob. It is so wonderful to have a husband who respects God and loves His Word. I am a blessed, blessed woman!!

After the show we are going to look around at some of the Amish country shops and hopefully find a wedding ring quilt in our price range.

I will be back with pictures!!!

God Bless

Menu Plan Monday

Well, this week will be another simple meal week with some dinners out. DH is away on business all week and it's just lonely little me. I usually go out with friends on weeks like this so I'm not eating alone. DH and I are trying not to eat out as much so I think I'll work on eating small meals at home.

• Monday - Chicken Salad Sandwich from Jodi at Deputy Domain. I had some of this over at Mary's home last week and got some delicious apples from her so I will have a sandwich and have leftovers for a tossed salad for lunch tomorrow.
• Tuesday - Seafood night at the local bar and grille. I might head over there with a friend for all you can eat crab legs. So fun to have a girls' night out. If not, I will probably have some Vegetable soup my Mother gave to me and some hot biscuits. DH won't eat vegetable soup so if I want to have it I have to eat it while he's gone. :)
• Wednesday - Chicken Cheese Quesadillas with salsa. I have my bible fellowship tonight so I need something quick.
• Thursday - Beef stew with biscuits. I love walking into a yummy smelling home. I can throw that together in the morning and have it ready when I get home.
• Friday - DH gets home tonight but I'm not sure when. I will probably do a cheeseburger quiche because it's one of his favorites and it is easily reheated for when he arrives. Throw a salad with it and you have a well rounded meal.
• Saturday - DH and I are going to a minor league baseball game tonight so it will be grilled food that comes with our ticket price. I love going to the AAA games because these guys are playing with some real heart and you can get a great picnic package with all you can eat food and great seats for $17.00! We are meeting some people from our bible fellowship there and it should be a GREAT time.
• Sunday - We are having some manly men over to spend the night so I think we may do steak and potatos potatoes with broccoli. Of course some kind of chocolate dessert. I'm not sure yet.

Sure seems like a lot of dialog for a simple list of meals! LOL, I guess that's what blogging is all about. Last week's menus turned out great. We switched a couple of days around but I'm all about being flexible. DH was so proud of me for having dinner planned and not flailing around at the last minute until we ordered pizza! I was proud of me too!

YEA ME!!

For more wonderful menu plans (some with recipes) head over to I'm an Organizing Junkie and check out the great ideas.

Thankful Thursday

Wow, this one is going to be tough. I had a rough day yesterday and it has been a difficult few months. I know that writing down those things I'm thankful for will help me handle life in the best way I know how.

I am thankful for:

• A minister with great insight who lets the love of God show through all he does. His sharing last night really hit home;
• A wonderful group of friends and fellow believers to fellowship with and learn with;
• A sweet and loving husband who is willing to hear my fears and address them with the Word, no matter how much I resist (I tend to want to mope);
• Scriptures that are deep inside my heart that only need a quick reminder (from DH or myself) "Romans 8:1, darling;"
• A mother who will take the time to pray with me when DH is in a meeting and God seems so far away;
• Fresh peaches, ripe for eating;
• A cat who, despite his faults, entertains and snuggles when he senses I need it;
• Lungs to take deep breaths;
• A reliable car with a radio that blasts when I need to stay alert and awake;
• Golden Oldies to sing really loud to;
• Thankful Thursday to remind me to breath with those lungs and pray with my understanding and leave the rest in His hands.

Wow, so much deeper than I thought it would be. I think it's just what I needed. Thanks to Sting My Heart for hosting Thankful Thursday.

An Evening of Game with DH

For Christmas last year my Mom and Dad got my DH a beautiful chess set. It had been languishing in a box for long enough, I decided to set it up on our coffee table in the living room so Dh and I could play "on a whim."





The chess pieces are soldiers and officials from the Revolutionary War. DH played as the United States and I was England. The most difficult thing about this chess set is the lack of a female "Queen." The box didn't come with labels so we just guessed. DH figured the officer with the bars on his shoulders was the king and made the other officer the "queen." I think on my end King George ended up being the "queen" simply because he was wearing a cloak dress. Poor King George.

I am not a chess master. I dont claim to be one and I really only know how the different pieces move (Even if they are "cloaked" as queens). I figured I could learn from DH how to play and we could have a great time. He was really helpful and showed me a lot. I know more now about chess than I ever did.

The chess match did not last long. I tried to win but...




I just couldn't alter history. America is still free and what remained of Great Britain has retreated. Poor King George.



I guess the Revolutionary War will have to be fought again another day.

Bacon makes anything taste great!

DH and I had some family and friends over for dinner last weekend. My father-in-love and his girlfriend and his girlfriend’s niece all came to the house on Saturday night for food and fellowship. My FIL loves oysters so my DH wanted to make some oysters wrapped in bacon for an appetizer.

I am not a big fan of oysters. I think they are slimy and gross looking. After confirming that DH would be making that appetizer I put “oysters” on my shopping list.



Don’t they look yummy? You can’t tell from the picture but that oyster on the top of the jar is spinning around uncontrollably! EEWWWW

After DH rinsed out the oysters thoroughly and got the grit out of them he got out the bacon and sliced it in half. Then he took one large oyster or two smallish oysters and placed it like so:


Then he wrapped the bacon around the oyster and put a toothpick through the middle.




The toothpick serves two purposes. One is to hold it all together and the other is to enable easy turning on the grill.



I am proud to say I did the last row of oysters on the cookie sheet! They aren’t so slimy…ok, they are, but I was able to get over it. : )

Then my grill master husband put them all on the grill. That’s a fish pan you see under the majority of the oysters. That comes in handy when we want to grill a nice flaky fish and the grates on the grill are too harsh for the tender fish.



Then when the bacon is fully cooked, the oysters are done too.

Drain them on a paper towel or two and then eat them while they are hot!


I have to admit it, I think I may have been converted! I don’t like them raw and they feel slimy, but they sure taste great wrapped in bacon and grilled!! Of course, everything tastes better with bacon.

Even Spaz the cat thinks so.

Update on DH

His fever broke at around 3AM. It was as high as 103 degrees. I was in a state of constant prayer for most of the early morning. I was so blessed to see 100.3 degrees this morning. Then, before I left for work, it was 99.7. Thank you Father!! DH was moving around and seemed to be feeling better. It certainly gave me peace of mind heading off to work knowing he was better. I will go home at lunch of course and check on my wonderful DH but I think we are through the worst of it.

It is at times like this I feel such a strong pull to be at home. I am tired from being up all night, my DH still needs me and here I am at a JOB! Sometimes I wonder how I can reframe my priorities and realize I don't need to feel bad for my employers if I leave. I have grown so accustomed to them I would hate to leave but I can feel everyday my priorities are skewed.

I guess I better get back to work and focus my attentions to the tasks at hand. Work heartily as unto the Lord, not men.

Its only half past 12 but I don't care...my DH needs me

Here I am, sitting at my computer waiting until 1AM so I can check my DH's temperature again. He was shivering and burning up earlier tonight. Once we got in bed I tried to stay close to him so I could help regulate his body temperature. I couldn't get to sleep because he was BURNING UP!! It seemed like the longer I lay with my back to his the hotter he got. He was sleeping really hard but whimpering in his sleep. I started to get really concerned. I prayed for him as well as myself. I could tell I was losing it with worry. I got up and did what any "new" wife would do, I called my Mama!

We prayed together and I started getting more peaceful. She gave me some good advice. Get his temperature (which I hadn't done yet, just the hand on the forehead thing) and then give him some Tylenol. Wait 45 minutes to an hour and take his temperature again. If it hasn't gone down even a little bit, call the doctor. After discussing his symptoms we figure he has the flu. He had a filling done last week and his jaw has been aching ever since. He has been so busy at work he hasn't had the opportunity to get it checked out yet. DH and I figure his bite just needs adjusted but Mama said it might be some infection started there and that could be the reason for his symptoms.

She encouraged me to remember that "by his stripes, ye WERE healed." Past tense. God has already put in great guards in our bodies to fight off infection. He has also provided for medications and doctors if our bodies need a little help.

DH has a temperature of 102. He took some Tylenol and now I wait for another 1/2 hour to wake him and take another reading. I am believing for great deliverance. DH needs his rest but a little peace of mind for me will help me rest better and take care of him too.

On the topic of medical care, growing up we always had 1st, 2nd, and 3rd Aid.

1st Aid - Pray for yourself, if you don't feel better within 10 minutes-6 hours (depending on the severity of your injury) go to 2nd Aid. And of course if it is life threatening, go to the HOSPITAL.

2nd Aid - Have someone minister to you. Sometimes someone outside yourself can see things you can't and can give you some words of comfort and encouragement. This can be via telephone (gotta love technology) because even just talking through your symptoms can be helpful. And of course if it is life threatening, go to the HOSPITAL

and last but NOT least

3rd Aid - Seek medical help. A lot of times I skip right to 3rd Aid because I know what is causing my headache (lack of water) or my tummy ache (indigestion, heartburn). The great thing about our bodies is that we have the ability to sense what is wrong and really, if we lift things to God, he can and does give us the guidance we need.

So, off I go to check on DH and maybe then I can get some rest. I should take some Airborne too, so I don't catch whatever this little bug is.

I Am Making Progress

This past weekend I got a lot accomplished. I did my routines (was up early and everything!) and even got some extra housework done. Here's a picture of my stars...




I did really well on Monday as well, although I don't have a picture of that one. Tuesday and Wednesday are a different story all together.

On Tuesday I decided not to take a shower that night because I was too tired. When I woke up on Wednesday I was so mad at myself for skipping that item on my routine. DH gave me a "free pass" on the laundry because of the plumbing situation but I ruined my "star power" by skipping my shower. So silly of me. So here I was on Wednesday, mad at myself for "failing" and giving up on the day because "the month is ruined anyway."

Can you say PERFECTIONIST!!!!!!!

Last night I was moping and pouting. DH wouldn't let me get away with it for long...he knew why I was pouting, I wanted him to say "it's ok about yesterday, go ahead and put your star on, it's been a rough week...etc." How childish and immature I am!!! Well, I renewed my mind and cut up some leftover steak for stirfry. I made dinner and got a load of laundry started. DH cleaned up the kitchen (unloaded and reloaded the dishwasher) and gave me a big hug. He reminded me I didn't need a "month" of stars, I need 30 days of consecutive stars. That is my goal. It was time to refocus and get back in gear.

This morning I had a dentist appointment at 8:00 A.M. I could have given up on my Morning Routine because "I don't have time this morning" but I DIDN'T.

I got a load of laundry started and I got the dishwasher unloaded. I have bible fellowship tonight so dinner will be quick and easy, maybe another stirfry, maybe some fast food. DH will be working late so he will probably grab a bite on his way home.

I am making progress but bad habits (and attitudes) are really hard to break! I am so thankful my DH knows me so well and is willing to lovingly reprove me with the Word when I am wrong! *Happy sigh* I am such a blessed woman.

Romans 12:2

And be not conformed to this world: but be ye transformed by the renewing of your mind, that ye may prove what is that good, and acceptable, and perfect, will of God.

Romans 8:1

There is therefore now no condemnation to them which are in Christ Jesus, who walk not after the flesh, but after the Spirit.

"Success Breeds Success"

This is what my mother would say to me when I would complain about having to do some little chore around the house when there were "bigger" things to be done.

Success Breeds Success = Faithful in least, faithful in much



That's right ladies...TWO stars now! And today has started off strong. DH said that on the weekends as long as I am up before 7 A.M. and get the rest of the things accomplished I can consider my Morning Routine successful. I was up at around 6:30 and have been running ever since. I took a break for a little while and watched "Nanny McPhee" on TV. So cute, it's like Mary Poppins with a little "umph."

Now I have more chores to get accomplished and some errands to run.

DH is working today and this week is going to be rough for him. He is the Engineer at a Natural Gas & Steam (called Combined Cycle) power plant and they are having an "outage" right now. Basically, they shut everything down, open things up and then they deep clean, repair, modify or overhaul everything and get everything up a running again. A LOT of long, hard days lay ahead and I know I will need to be on top of my game (so to speak) to keep everything peaceful. DH said there were three things he would like for me to focus on this week.

• Peaceful & Tidy Home
• Laundry Done
• Iced Tea ready when he gets home

He would also like simple meals that can be reheated if necessary. I think this week will be a time for cassaroles. I only have ONE in my repetoire (Shepherds Pie) so I guess I better do some digging. Any recommendations would be appreciated.

This is going to be a great week for me to work on my Husband Keeping skills :)

Focus and Shining Stars

I wish I could remember where I got this little picture. It really blesses me. If anyone recognizes it, please let me know, I want to give credit where credit is due!
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Shame on me for taking so long between posts!

I have been under the weather this past week. I believe I came down with the stomach bug so many people were talking about. I am grateful to be feeling much much better today.

Work is going ok. I have been so unfocused lately. I know part of it is because I have not been putting my full heart into my job. As much as I want to be home full time I know I have a responsibility to my Heavenly Father to represent Him in ALL that I do. Yes, even my full-time, away from home, mentally exhausting, secular, exciting, rewarding job.

DH and I talked last night about my lack of focus at work and my desire to be home full-time. We decided that until I get my Morning and Evening Routines down for a month I shouldn't even think about quitting to come home. I need to set myself up for success and establishing those routines is the way I can do this. I will do a separate post on my routines. I have silver stars I will be posting on my calendar at the end of every day to show myself I am accomplishing my goals.

I am so very thankful to have a problem-solving, sweet and loving supportive husband.

I feel all shiny inside!! It's time to make my calendar shiny too!

My Passion to be a SAHW and a Request for Help at the End

For a very long time I have longed to be a wife and mother. I have never had an intense desire to have a career. I attended college for 2 semesters and the best thing that came from my college experience was meeting my DH online.

DH proposed about 4 years later and I accepted. We were married in 2002.

Before our wedding, we learned DH had the opportunity to take a job in SW Pennsylvania, close to where his family lives.

We were moving! We moved almost one month after we were wed. I was raised in a military home and was used to moving. I was truly excited about the prospect of a new, fresh start as husband and wife in a new town.

DH had a good job and financially I didn’t need to work. FINALLY my time had come. I was going to be a SAHW and certainly, within a couple of years, we would be bringing our first child into the world.

As is so often the case, life did not go as planned. That first year I stayed home and expected to know EVERYTHING I need to take care of DH and our home. I expected to become my mother when that ring went on my finger. I was disappointed in my inability to focus on our home and our inability to have a child. I was unable to take care of my home, uncaring about my appearance, and downright FRUMPY.

It was hard not knowing anyone nearby. It was hard only having one vehicle, which husband took to work. That first year at his job he was working 80 hours a week. He was exhausted when he came home and I was miserable. After talking it through we decided I should try to find a part-time job, just to help me get out of the house and the ever present funk I was in. We bought a second vehicle and I put in for any part-time secretarial position I could find.

Flash forward 4 years. I am working 40 hours a week. We have our own home now and I have matured greatly from where I was 5 years ago. And now…

I WANT TO COME HOME!!! I want to be a SAHW. We understand it will take more financial and emotional effort to have a child (due to fertility problems). We understand it may never happen. I am willing to accept that (for now). I don’t have the empty feeling inside anymore. I know I am to be FIRST AND FOREMOST a helpmeet to my husband.

I am anxious and I need to be sure about my decision. DH will support me either way. He understands my desire to be at home and truly, I think he would prefer it. He does not, however, want the old frumpy wife again. Thus, I need to be sure about my decision.

We talked about it about a month ago and DH had some valid points. This is what I am working on right now.

These are the components DH has witnessed I need in my life to be happy and productive.

• Social interaction;
• Sense of purpose;
• Accountability;
• Being a contributing member of society; and
• Being challenged by my work.

I have all these things at my job and DH wants me to figure out how I will be able to find them at home or, if I can't find them, how will I supplement them.

I need to reason it through and identify where these components will come from. DH can’t provide a lot of them because he works ~ 12 hours a day.

I need to study each component in the Word to see where biblical women got these things.

Thanks so much for reading this. It was more about putting it in writing than anything.

I am not looking for counsel. I want to make that clear. I know that this is our family’s decision.

I am simply looking for the right avenues to research. I want to be able to make a decision on this by summer of this year and I just thought I could get some good resources from you all.

I have a wonderful woman who is our Fellowship Coordinator’s wife. She is wonderful to bounce thoughts off of. I just thought I would take advantage of the on-line community and any input you might have about books or simply records to look at in the Bible. I am currently reading through Ruth and noting (where I can) where Ruth received her support and all of those things listed.

Thanks so very much.

A Change of Scenery

The title obviously refers to the changes I have made to my Blog layout. The rest of this post is titled:

A SWEET REMINDER OF WHAT IT IS TO BE LOVED

This past weekend I was really blessed to be a part of the “Couples Advance” with my Bible fellowship. There were 8 couples at different stages of their relationships (some just dating, some engaged, some married under 5 years, and some over 20). It was really fun learning about what the Bible says about the marriage relationship.

I think the best part of the Advance was the activities we did. I received permission from DH to share some of our findings.

One activity was to Write down 5 things you would like to do with your spouse. This was an eye-opener for both of us because we really agreed on these five things:

• Focus on activities/attractions available in our area during “date night” (instead of just meals and movies)
• Visit/fellowship more with friends
• Focus on healthy meals/exercise together
• Spend more time with family – build stronger relationships
• Spend more time on home improvement projects together

This was cool because when we got to the third one DH suggested it. I am so excited that he would like to do this together. I have been talking about walking together after dinner or on the weekends. Just being more physical in our activities instead of just “dinner and a movie.”

That activity we worked on together and got the five things together. This next activity was one we did individually and then shared what we wrote. This was so awesome because DH and I got the exact same answers in the exact same order!!!! Talk about being like-minded.

List 3 things you are thankful to God for in your relationship.

• Our communication
• Our true FRIENDSHIP
• Our family ties, the fact that we have great relationships with our families.

Isn’t that AWESOME!?

DH and I had a really fun time. It really opened up a lot of opportunity for discussion in our marriage. We truly love each other and most importantly we love God and His Word above all else.

Truly I am a blessed woman.